Triggers: Everyone has them

I’m going to repeat that statement. EVERYONE HAS TRIGGERS. One more time, EVERYONE HAS TRIGGERS. It is worth repeating.

Some of you may not believe me and that’s okay. Let’s talk about it.

Triggers come in all shapes and sizes, for all humans. Triggers do not discriminate. As children we all learned about the five senses. Hearing, taste, smell, touch, and sight. Triggers use our senses to appear, and at times to attack negatively. Not all triggers are negative. Some triggers are actually, very positive.

Some triggers cause reactions that are physical. Allergies are reactions to triggers. Pollen is a trigger. Pollen can cause minor reactions for some people, sneezing, watery eyes. While other people, end up with serious issues, including sinus infections and trouble breathing. Peanuts can be vicious triggers for some people. The physical reaction to a peanut trigger is death for some. Many people carry epi-pens in case of a serious allergic reaction to a trigger. These type of triggers are better understood by most people. However, they are not always accepted. These are medical issues that some people may feel are too much too handle.

Are you more understanding of people with triggers that affect them physically, like the allergic reactions I described. Or do you feel as if those folks are just too much trouble for you. Maybe you think that they should take better care of themselves. That their allergic reactions would improve, get better, if they did. If that is how you feel, then I challenge you to stop complaining about those people, and instead, find a way to help them. Do your research, find out if there are improvements in medicine that could help them. On the other hand, you might prefer complaining. It really depends on how much you love the human with the triggers.

The triggers that cause emotional reactions are the most misunderstood.

Do you support the military? Or do you only say that you support the military to fit in with the world? PTSD stands for Post-traumatic stress disorder. Do you only support veterans and active military that are healthy? Are veterans with PTSD too much trouble to understand, to tip toe around. Their triggers are their responsibility, but if you support them, really support them, their triggers are your responsibility too.

NOT Everyone with PTSD was in the military. Any traumatic event can cause PTSD in a human. A child that was abused, rape survivors, death, any survivor of any horrific event could be reminded of it by a trigger.

A sound, like the popping of fireworks. The sight and sound of a ceiling fan. The honking of a car horn. The smell from a fire pit. These could all be triggers for someone that has been through a traumatic event. More than reminders for the memory, these triggers can make a person feel as if they were still in the event. The past doesn’t feel like the past. It feels like present.

Let me explain, what I mean, when I say their triggers are your responsibility too. If your partner or child has PTSD and it’s the Fourth of July, do you take them to a firework show? Will the fireworks cause an emotional or physical reaction with your loved one? Is it more important to see the fireworks or to care for that person?

I am not passing judgement on your choice, just be honest with yourself. Don’t pretend to care for certain groups of people to fit in with the world. When your actions to the individual people you claim to support are different from your words. Your words should match your behavior.

Sometimes you do have to walk away. It has nothing to do with your behavior. It is about the person suffering from their triggers. For their safety, for your own safety, for the safety of your family, you have to walk away. It has nothing to do with how much you care about that person. It is about everyone’s health and safety. It’s okay to walk away. Do it without complaining or blaming. Do it with respect for everyone involved.

Triggers are the responsibility of the person that has them. The world does not have an obligation to tiptoe around a person with triggers. Or do they?

Triggers are the responsibility of the people that person has chosen to surround themselves with, people that show their love through their actions, their behavior. That person is trusting those in their circle to help them. To believe in them. If that’s not something you can do for a person struggling, love them enough to find them help, or walk away. Again, be honest with yourself, with complaining and without blaming.

The world is filled with military members, veterans, and their families. Does the world have an obligation to tiptoe around a person dealing with the repercussions of serving their country? The world can help. People can help, just by picking up the phone and calling someone that can talk a person through a crisis caused by a trigger.

One more thing, for me, the island, the beach, the ocean, are part my center, my soul. For other humans the places that calm me, could trigger them. We are individuals, what works for me is different than what works for you. What calms us, what triggers us, is different for each one of us. The world would be boring if we were all the same.

Next time I’ll discuss positive triggers and reactions.